Dragon Tales

HAPPY HELLOAGAIN to all you Microfictioners and Microfiction affectionados, and welcome to another chapter of

Microfiction Monday,
where the fun is all about a picture painting

a betweenable 140 characters,
or even fewer!

CONFUSED? Maybe just a smitch? Then how ‘bout I fully explain the Microfiction Monday gist? Every Sunday evening, Miss Susan over at Stony River posts a photo or illustration and her own "microfiction" inspired by it. At the same timely, she also happily invites you to do the same! (REMINDER: The 140 or less-count should include spaces and punctuation, too.)

HERE'S THIS week's image
and MY STORY:

TALKING WITH HIS hands about his favorite TV show*, Wrong Way Merlin failed miserably. -86 characters

*Glee

ONE WORD:

Loser!

NOW GO out there and make it a great week!
And if you’ve gotta make some noise, let it be

joyful!

BUNNY! BUNNY! TUESDAY aheadly,
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

Rest in peace, my Mollo and ZuZu.

Ahoy, Matey!

HAPPY
Jack Handey
FRIDAY!

"IF YOU MAKE ships in a bottle, I bet the thing that really makes your heart sink is when you look in and there at the wheel is Captain Termite." –Jack Handey

NO DOUBT ABOUT it. There definitely is

a termite helming on my end.

Man, the days (and nights) have been Ca-razy with a capital "C"! How about you? How’s the world been treating you? Are you, too, in need of a

Lifesaver?

*drums up a Howard Cunningham voice*

THREE WORDS: Be my guest!

Candy circles for everyonely,
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

Sweet dreams, my Mollo, ZuZu and good ol' Jim Croce, who, like me in this blog, once did a bottle topic, too.

Image Credits:
Ship In A Bottle: Enhanced Innovations
Lifesavers: Ad Classix

Sign Language

[ATTENTION: ABC Wednesdayers --> To find my contribution to the upcoming letter "S" (official release date being May 26), wade through this Jack Handey, as it cabooses it.]

(Then would this be many trees falling in the woods?)

"TOO BAD YOU can’t just grab a tree by the very tiptop and bend it clear over the ground and then let her fly, because I bet you’d be amazed at all the stuff that comes flying out." –Jack Handey

HEY, FOLKS, HAPPY
Jack Handey
FRIDAY!

HMM. LET ME see.
Should we talk trees, then, or flying?
Okay. Horoscopes it is!

LONG BEFORE people came to recognise me for my zodiacal hairdo, (<-- Yes, because I was that into it. Dell’s Horoscope just happened to be one of the magazines I first ever got my little mitties on, shortly after I learned to read, and I actually, and there for a whilely --and especially on school

Picture Days--
based my "look" on my star sign:

Aries - The Ram
March 21 - April 19

ASTROLOGICAL PROFILE: Aries people are generally borderline maniacs happy-go-lucky zodiac types, who are never born. Being optimists, they instead skip gaily from their mothers' wombs. Aries are creative independents, who always hold management positions (God is probably an Aries.) And because Aries people have a tendency to leap before looking and to take risks that shock more cautious types, it is not surprising that many of them gravitate toward risky professions such as war, police coppery, stunt work, sports, prostitution, and race car driving. Rams are also emotionally courageous to the point of recklessness and will change their entire lives (and underwear, as well) on a whim in order to follow some dream or romantic inclination. They are playful, adventurous, and chatter boxy, too. That means their idea of a fun vacation is going off on a wild tangent. Although sometimes most times, painfully honest, Aries are sincere. (<– A nice feature. As a Sagittarius-y RuPaul has told us, time and again, "Sincerity is everything. And if you can fake that, you’ve got it made!") They are people people, who often like to meddle in the affairs of others (Perfect example: Anita Bryant (March 25, 1940), the only Aries person who did NOT gaily skip to get here.) and are also opposed to eating beets, because anything that tastes like dirt, can’t be food. It is said that the best way to make an Ariesian laugh is through physical comedy. (Pretending a bowling ball is stuck on one’s hand during the middle of a game, or a face Scotch taped, Pee Wee Herman-style can be the best medicine, whenever a ram’s daubers are down.) Aries is otherwise known as the silly sign of the Zodiac.

FOR WHAT it’s worth, which is actually a lot, because I always take what the aligned dots in the sky have to say to heart, here is my this week’s horoscope:

"ENLIGHTENMENT AND CONFUSION will both be yours this week, when a tree falls in the woods only to make the sound of one hand clapping."

TWO WORDS: Ramifications.

What’s your signly,
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

BY THE BY, since my daughter Puppet and I will be away next week (This coming Tuesday, 'Glee Live! In Concert!' will be high gearing it at the Rosemont, where we can’t wait to ca$h in our tickets for an unprecedented live event: FOX and 'Glee' co-creator Ryan Murphy are bringing the hit TV musical to the stage! Soon, we’ll be stuffing our packed-and-readied-on-the-day-we-ordered-our-tickies bags into the car, which I’ll then point full-speed-ahead to Illinois and step on the gas!), my blogging efforts will be a smitch stifled. So, today’s post includes my next-up installment of ABC Wednesday Round Six (a weekly look at what’s on my mind, this "go" beginning with the letter "S" - For other participating bloggers’ wassups, just give the alphabet soup lady a "click." You’ll find her right over there, slurping –>)

is for...

WHAT ELSE?

A

spectacular night of the cast of Glee
singing and dancing
like there’s no tomorrow!

Rest in peace, my Mollo and Zuzie.

Image Credits:
Ram-Cat: CatsDo.com
hand-clapper: partynotions.net
Glee Live! In Concert! logo: GleeSpace.com
Letter S: PetCo.com

Kissing Owies

MAY I OFFER you

a happy, little morsel?

BY THAT, I mean a smitch of good news!
Yep and gosh darnit,
because if anyone deserves some,
THEY JUST GAVE IT TO US:

Kelly Preston and John Travolta
have just announced they
will be getting a visit from the stork
in about six months from now!!!

SEVEN WORDS:

Nothing says lovin’ like

something from the oven!

May a best day be yoursly,
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

Rest in peace, my Mollo, Zuzie, and Master Jett Travolta.

Image Credits:
Chocolate Chip: ChocChipCookieRecipe.com
Kelly and John: Starpulse.com
"Baby and Stork" by Anne Anderson

Giddy Up Oom Poppa Omm Poppa Mow Mow, Giddy Up Oo– RATS! Now That Song Will Be Playing in My Head All the Live Long. Et Tu, Brute?

It takes a big man to fill Cowboy Dan’s boots.

YIPPEE ti-ah hoo heigh-yah hoo, buckaroos! It’s that time again! Welcome to another installment of ABC Wednesday Round Six (that of which always seems to land on a Tuesday for me), a weekly look at what’s on my mind, this "go" beginning with the letter "R." (For other participating bloggers’ wassups, just give the lady lapping up the alphabet soup a "click." You’ll find her right over there, mid-slurp --> No, not Betula. Up a smitch. There you go!)

is for...

roller coaster!

I LOVE movies to pieces, especially the ones that
allow you to borrow wisdom from them.

Opie’s do just that.

YEP, in my estimation, all of

Ron Howard’s
films have been good ones.
But my favorite would have to be

Parenthood (1989).

It offers a mighty big pearl
that I often replay in my head:

[Gil Buckman (Steve Martin) has been complaining to his wife, Karen (Mary Steenburgen), about his complicated life; Grandma (Helen Shaw) wanders into the room.]

Grandma: You know, when I was nineteen, Grandpa took me on a roller coaster.
Gil: Oh?
Grandma: Up, down, up, down. Oh, what a ride!
Gil: What a great story.
Grandma: I always wanted to go again. You know, it was just so interesting to me that a ride could make me so frightened, so scared, so sick, so excited, and so thrilled all together! Some didn't like it. They went on the merry-go-round. That just goes around. Nothing. I like the roller coaster. You get more out of it.

THREE WORDS:
Ride ‘em, cowboy!

To see the film clip, click HERE-ly,,
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

Rest in peace, my Mollo and ZuZu.

Image Credits:
Steve Martin: 21Pimplico.com
Letter R: Tatutina
Pa and Opie: PatryShopParadiseStore.com
Ron Howard: TheInsider.com
Parenthood poster: movieberry.com
Grandma: NYDailyNews.com

Deliver Deletter, Desooner, Debetter

HAPPY HELLOAGAIN to all you
Microfictioners and Microfiction affectionados,

and welcome to another chapter of

Microfiction Monday,

where the fun is all about a picture painting
a betweenable 140 characters, or even fewer!

CONFUSED? Maybe just a smitch? Then, how ‘bout I fully explain the Microfiction Monday gist? Every Sunday evening, Miss Susan, over at Stony River, posts a photo or illustration and her own "microfiction" inspired by it, then she happily invites you to do the same! (REMINDER: The 140 or less-count should include spaces and punctuation, too.)

HERE’S
this week’s image
AND my “story”:

EAGERLY ANTICIPATING a “special delivery" from the mailman, Muriel left the front door ajar. –92 characters

POSTSCRIPT:

THREE WORDS spoken by Muriel to a parting Postman Pete, that would echo in his leetle head, sustaining him until their next Tuesday rendezvous:

“You send me!” –a happily disheveled Muriel

IT SORT OF gives “You’ve got mail!”
a whole new meaning, dudn’t it?

I GOTTA QUIT. It’s getting hot in here.

Signed, sealed, delivered-- I’m yours,
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

Rest in peace, my Mollo and ZuZu.

Credit:
Postage stamp first downloaded at examiner.com

Still Lost

Good day, SIX WORD Saturdayers! Here’s what’s going on in my neck of the woods, sentenced in six. (For a looksee at what others are sixily up to as well, "click" the SWS button, right over there —>)

SIX WORDS:

"JESUS CHRIST IS not a weapon."
–Carmen Reyes to her son, Hugo (Lost)

WE JUST sewed up Season 4 of
OUR LOST MARATHON.
READY OR NOT, here we come, Season 5!

Later,
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

Sweet dreams, my Mollo and Zuzie.

Photo Credit: JC and Hurley/ The Attack

It's the O-O-ONLY Way to Fly!

“ONCE WHEN I was in Hawaii, on the island of Kauai, I met a mysterious old stranger. He said he was about to die and wanted to tell someone about the treasure. I said, ‘Okay, as long as it's not a long story. Some of us have a plane to catch, you know.’ He stared telling his story, about the treasure and his life and all, and I thought: ‘This story isn't too long.’ But then, he kept going, and I started thinking, ‘Uh-oh, this story is getting long.’ But then the story was over, and I said to myself: ‘You know, that story wasn't too long after all.’ I forget what the story was about, but there was a good movie on the plane. It was a little long, though.” –Jack Handey

HAPPY

Jack Handey

FRIDAY!

SUPPOSEDLY, I am on my one and only bathroom break. The reality: I am sacrificing a bladder pit stop to instead let you know that I am temporarily not blogging--only until our game of catch-up has accomplished just that. Presently, my daughter Puppet and I are about halfway through Season 4 of

Lost,

and will be marathoning till May 23, when the series finale will be aired. We’ve been getting little sleep, if any, which is okay by us, since we’re both insomniacs. And anyway, this certain phenom sometimes takes over us which has proven to be quite rejuvenating. Did you know, sudden but extremely brief bouts of narcolepsy can actually fuel one’s fire? Yeah, well, that’s what we keep telling ourselves. No worries, the bruising from the falls is mild and my husband has hidden the car keys, so the roads are safe.

AND SPEAKING of fuel, to simplify things, but mostly just cuz it’s fun --because we always try to theme it up when we’re non-stop, back-to-backing movies or television series episodes– whenever we get hungry, we feed on TV dinners, which we pretend are

airline food!

OOP! The Captain has turned on the seat belt sign in the livingroom and it’s illuminating like crazy! He’s announcing “We are now crossing a zone of turbulence. Please return your seats and keep your seat belts fastened. Thank you." *scrambling* I’d best be doing just that!

Buckle up-ly,
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

REST IN PEACE, my Mollo, ZuZu and, so far, Gary Troup (sucked into one of the plane's engines), Captain Seth Norris (killed by Smokey), Edward Mars, The Marshal (euthanized by Jack), Joanna (drowning), Christian Shephard (heart attack Down Under), Omar (shot by Sayid), pregnant patient Beth (drunken Christian severs hepatic artery during surgery), Susan (bloody blood illness), Scott (murdered by Ethan Rom), Ethan Rom (6 blasts in the chest from Charlie), Sawyer's father and his mother Laura (pop shoots mom, then, self), Frank Duckett (killed by Sawyer), Grandpa Tito (heart attack), unknown person (leapt off the top of Hurley's accountancy firm), Boone (massive internal bleeding from being crushed by the Beechcraft plane), Essam (self-inflicted head-shoot), Tom Brennan (shot in the chest while helping Kate), Arzt (explodes via dynamite), Jae Lee (suicide: window-jump accented by a Jin's car-landing), Colleen (shot by Sun), female villager (shot by Emeka), at least two men in the church (taken out by Eko), Eko (inhaled too much Smokey), Edmund Burke (flattened and smeared by a bus), Danny Pickett (shot by Juliet), Tricia Tanaka and her cameraman (struck by

a meteorite at the Cluck Cluck Shack),

Ms. Klugh (shot by Mikhail), Peter Talbot (found dead --with Locke's name on a piece of paper in his pocket), Howard L. Zukerman (poisoned by Nikki and Paulo), Nikki and Paul (paralyzed by spiders and buried alive by Sawyer and Hurley, who think they are dead), Sabine (pregnancy complications), Anthony Cooper (strangled to death by Sawyer), Emily (dies giving birth to Ben), Roger Linus (gassed to death by his son, Ben), Approximately 40 members of the DHARMA Initiative (gassed by Ben and the others), Tom (shot by Sawyer), Ivan and Diane plus three unnamed others (blown up in Sayid and Bernard’s ambush), Matthew and Luke (shot by Jin), Ryan Pryce (run over by a DHARMA van driven by Hurley), Jason (Sayid's legs break dance his neck), Greta and Bonnie (shot by Mikhail), Charlie Pace (drowns after Mikhail detonates a grenade at the Looking Glass), Naomi Dorrit (stab wound after Locke throws a knife in her back), Mr. Avellino (shot by Sayid), Elsa (again with the Sayid), George Minkowski (time travel complications), Regina (self-imposed ocean jump), and Karl and Danielle Rousseau (shot and killed by Keamy or one of his men).

PRETTY MORBID compilation, eh?
Sorry. You look upset.
PERHAPS A

Jin
and tonic to settle those nerves?

Image Credits:
Stewardess: DarkRoastedBlend.com
Cluck Cluck Shack: squidoo.com

Extreme Makeover: SparkleFarkle Edition

The year was 2003 and my favorite sandwich was about to be changed forever.

GOOD DAY, fellow alphabet soup sippers! Yep, it’s that time again. Welcome to another installment of ABC Wednesday Round Six, a weekly look at what’s on my mind, this "go" beginning with the letter "Q." (For other participating bloggers’ wassups, just give the lady lapping up the Campbell’s Font Stew a "click." You’ll find her right over there in the passenger’s seat -->)

is for...

Quashing my appetite.

For Reality TV, that is.
It’s something I’ve just got to do,
since I’m waaay too nuts about it.

I GUESS IT all started about seven years ago-- one lazy, crazy August night, when I took MTV up on its offer: the highly anticipated (at least, at my house) premiere of

Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica.

Yep, it was WHAM! BAM! Thank you, Joe Simpson (who pressed the network into giving his daughter and son-in-law this particular spotlight after Michael Jackson and Lisa Marie Presley reneged), because, minutes into it, I realised I would be totally invested in the next 40 installments of the series, and there would even come a time when I would pivotal-pointy seal my commitment to Mr. and Mrs. Lachey’s marital bliss by trading in my regular tunie brand for another, more

buck, buck, buacky kind!

IN THE YEARS that followed, SO DID I –watching such television gems as The Ashlee Simpson Show (Naturally. Joe still had me in his grips.), Amish in the City, The Simple Life (YES, I dared to go there, so sue me.), My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiancé, Dr. 90210 (Dr 90210uch?!), Supernanny, Trading Spouses (<– Thought-provoking: I learned that green is green, no matter what side of the fence you’re on, even if it’s the artificial turf of "Reality"), The Simple Life: Road Trip (Like I didn’t get my fill the first go ‘round.), The Simple Life: Interns (I called it quits after this season, replacing it with Hef and the gang in The Girls Next Door), Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List, The Two Coreys (That's right, I watched it. SOMEBODY HAD TO. But, to keep my brain from turning completely to mush, I DID draw the line at Scott Baio is 45...and Single. SOMEBODY HAD TO. Plus, Scott Baio is an ass. What? Oh, come on, SOMEBODY had to say it. You don't really think he's as Chachi as Chachi, do you? Or as in charge as Charles? Sorry to be the bubble-burster. Heck, if you don’t believe me, just scare up a few episodes of Scott Baio and see for yourself. And if you're truly into eyeball torture, catch an even colder-hearted Baio in Scott Baio is 46... and Pregnant. You’ll be nostalgic for him, a year earlier, I promise you. Okay, OKAY. I lied. I was addicted to both of these programs, too.), Scream Queens, and I Know My Kid’s a Star hosted by the somewhat annoying irrepressible Danny Bonaduce.

DEPLORABLE, I know.
But, do you know what’s even more pathetic?

If I could turn back time,
I WOULDN'T CHANGE A THING.
Not even the brand of

tuna I switched over to.

YEP, THESE DAYS, I’m still having at it. Still wearing the Reality TV feedbag, so to speak. Uh-huh, among the many faux actualities I "ingest," allow me to bend your ear about a few. (Better get comfortable. You know how I get. *glances back at what this blog already reads* Sorry. I should have warned you right at the start.)

I GO OUT of my way to keep up with the Kardashians. I "sew" up every season of

Project Runway.

I never say no to

Yes to the Dress.

I’d rather count

Duggars,
than

sheep.

(I TAKE GREAT pride in the fact that I can recite all 19 children’s names faster than Mama Duggar can! *inhales deeply before spewing* Josh, Jana, John-David, Jill, Jessa, Jinger, Joseph, Josiah, Joy-Anna, Jedidiah, Jeremiah, Jason, James, Justin, Jackson, Jumper Cables, Johannah, Jordyn-Grace and Josie!!! WAIT A MINUTE. Th-that was 20...!?)

AND, WHEN I’m not folding my laundry to the tune of Wife Swap reruns, or waiting for Donald Trump's hair to move on Celebrity Apprentice, I happily accept

my weekly invitation to Hollywood,

where I enjoy rooting for Tori Spelling as she tries to maintain a loving connection with her more-unlikeable-with-every-passing-season husband Dean, while raising their ex-nanny Patsy, adorable daughter Stella, and son Liam, who looks astonishingly like his grandfather (the late Aaron Spelling), only much, MUCH younger and more like a doorknob. (As harsh as I might sound, I AM one of Tori’s biggest fans. Just click HERE. It will take you to TV.com’s "Tori Spelling Person Page," that of which I was long ago named the editor of!)

*reluctantly picks up the TV Guide to scan a zillion-billion other Reality programs yellow-Sharpie highlighted, so that not one Reality-stone is left unturned*

HMM...
I suppose the wise thing to do, would be to quash.

*reviews television listing once more*

QUESTION:
What is the chance that I will eliminate one, if any,
Reality shows from my TV viewing lineup?

ONE WORD:

Remote.

Real-ly,
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

Rest in peace, my Mollo and ZuZu.

Image Credits:
Letter Q: veer.com
Craveless: shopsafe.com
Tori/Dean assortment: Michael Lavine/Oxygen
Remote: product-reviews.net

A Rose By Any Other Name...

other [muhth-er] n. Mom, Momma, Mommy, Mum, Mummy, Mumsy, Ma, Mamma, Mammy, Maither, Maiter, Marmie, Mater, Maman, Mutti, Love!

THREE WORDS:

HAPPY
Mothra’s Day!