Sheep Thrills

(caged kit kat courtesy of photosonnny)

"IT’S FASCINATING to think that all around us there's an invisible world we can't even see. I'm speaking, of course, of the World of the Invisible Scary Skeletons." --Jack Handey

HAPPY
Jack Handey
FRIDAY!

BABY, IT'S COLD this afternoon in SparkleFarkleville, and, if you know me, and I know I do, you're already onto me: I SIMPLY LOVE IT! Uh-huh, my most perfect element is

when the weather outside
is "frightful"

(image credit: Concumers Union of the U.S.)
AKA Frigiderrière,

and, right now,
FOUR WORDS:
I AM IN IT!

Yep, winter,
OR

anything close to it,
is my favourite colour!

BUT SINCE IT'S NOT yet, and with that anything-close-to-it part having just been said, I'm more than happy to settle for a nice, exceptionally freezing fall day! Mittens on their leashes yet or not, I'm grabbing for the gusto, because *contently lets loose happy-go-lucky little sigh* there's nothing I like better than being nesty-wrapped in my afghan (that of which looks exactly like

the one the back of Roseanne's couch wears! (<-- Aren't I the fortunate one, if I do say so myself?!), while eating something stick to my ribsy as I watch the world brrrr by, right outside my window! *catches reader nervously glancing back at blog's lead-in picture* No, that's NOT what I'm trying to say. I DIDN'T JUST EAT ONE OF MY CATS. Nope, I save them only for the coldest winter days.

I ate a sheep instead.

EVER SINCE I was a smitch at my gramma's yellow kitchen table with that extra hank of flowered floor linoleum thumbtacked to its top like a Polish tablecloth, because truly that is what it was (and much easier to "swipe cleany, too, mind ya!"), I've been a huge fan of

Campbell's Scotch Broth soup!

*blog edges go blurry as SparkleFarkle gets reminisce-y*

IT WAS SO hearty and pretty and THICK! (Gramma made sure of that by never adding the water like the heat-it-up directions asked her to do. And that way, I got to eat the whole can, too!) She always sided this particular soup with pumpkin butter that had a "leetle" bit of bread underneath it, but since I'm fresh out of both, I had to skip that step today. RATS.

EVEN BACK THEN, I had already put an almost total kibosh on my meat-eating. No kidding, a mere bite or two of an occasional Oscar Mayer hot dog (<--And never an Amour! Man, they smelled too much like Dick Gucchi, the man down the street from us who sometimes lived in the trunk of his car in front of his house, while his wife watched from the porch.) would cause my brain to flood with images of little baby animals (sometimes Disney's), begging Mr. Nitchske, the local butcher, to "Please don't make us be food!"

WHENEVER THE RADIO said it was very, very cold, Gramma would grab her smallest pot and tell me Scotch Broth would be the best thing to stick to my ribs, and, yes, it was very, very cold out and I thought Gramma's advice sounded cozy: I wanted to eat it!

SO, TO AVOID any waterworks and because she had a special way about her, Gramma somehow convinced me that "No muttons had tah die so dat we cudt have mutton brawt, and God tonly knows whawt those tiny flecks Old Man Campbell's got floatin' in dere. He says sit's meat, but datsnot meat. He's sah liar. [points at empty soup can] It says so, right tere ondah labol. Now eatdopp [smiles and points out the window at a sky full of clouds about to snow-burst!] whilst you looky!"

NOW YOU'RE HUNGRY , aren't you?

Scotch Broth, right?

I knew it!

*unwrapping snuggly self, offers Roseanne-y afghan*

GO FOR IT!

Soup's on! and I love ewe-ly,
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

Rest in peace, my Mollo, Zuzie, Gramma, but no muttons
because "No muttons had tah die so dat we cudt have mutton brawt."

They Tell Me I'm the BIG "G" and I Believe Them

WELCOME TO the happily-hosted-by-Grandma’s-Goulash Succinctly Yours, a perfectly wonderful meme that picks up where our dearly departed Microfiction Monday left off by asking the burning question:

(Laying in wait.)
How low can you go?

(Also laying in wait.)
THE GIST: Use the photo provided by GG as inspiration for a story of 140 characters or 140 words. (It doesn’t have to be exactly 140, just not more.) Oh?! *nods an impressed head* You want an even BIGGER challenge?! Then incorporate the word of the week into your flash tale! This Monday's assignment is "mired," which I chose to skip since that smitch of the game is optional. <–Whew! and thank God, because I don't need that kind o' presha!)

HERE’S
September 26th’s picture
AND my story:

"Ready! Aim! Fire!" less than father-of-the-year Ted commanded himself beneath the roar of his industrial-strength leaf sucker. Yep, the kids never knew what hit them. Neither did their suddenly withdrawn college $aving$ account$. Later, Ted would turn the ignition key of his brand, spankin' new corvette and ride off into the sunset. --52 words

FIVE WORDS:

There's one born every minute.
("Sucker," get it? Sure you did!
There for a minute, I forgot you're not me. LOL!)

AND DON'T I KNOW IT. I'm just saying, so live-and-breathe-it it is to me that, if ever pen my memoirs, Gullible's Travels would make for the perfect title!

I'll believe anything, just try me-ly,
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

Rest in peace, my Mollo and Zuzie.

It's a Wrap!

"I THINK A GOOD PRODUCT would be 'Baby Duck Hat.' It's a fake baby duck, which you strap on top of your head. Then you go swimming underwater until you find a mummy duck and her babies, and you join them. Then all of the sudden, you stand up out of the water and roar like Godzilla. Man those ducks really take off! Also Baby Duck Hat is good for parties." --Jack Handey

OKAY. I changed a word so the Handeyism would fit the picture. I guess I leave you no choice: Oh sussudio SO SUE SUE ME-DIO ALREADY. (LOL!)

FOUR WORDS:
HAPPY
Jack Handey
FRIDAY!

Short and sweetly yours,
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

Rest in peace, my Mollo and Zuzie.

Charlie Sheen Might Even Be There If He Can Remember What Day It Is!

Green Bay Packers - Brad Jones: “With the Outside linebacker tryout for Aaron Kampman over, the Packers need someone to fill his spot. With their first round pick being a great linebacker in Clay Matthews, the Packers got lucky with their seventh round pick being a good linebacker. [Even though] Jones looks like the favorite to start on the outside for the Pack this year and the Jones/Matthews duo could become a great pickup, [the team will be nothing without Anna "Paq" Paquin].” --a “doctored by SF~~~~~*” excerpt from BleacherReport.com, 2010

Big, BIG night ahead, here, at the Farkle house! We simply love award shows (so much so that I sometimes eat ‘em for breakfast!) and tonight being the 2011 Emmy® presentations, well, heck, I'm wee-my-pants ball-gown excitey! And, “for better or for worst” dressed, I love the Red Carpet show probably as much as the hoopla-ed trophy show itself! (I think my cranium might just explode because there's only three hours and 26 minutes, their time, till!!!)

Nearly tardy, actress Anna Paquin hit the 62nd Primetime Emmy® Awards Red Carpet mere minutes after Green Bay Packer tryouts.

I STILL CAN'T decide if I’m partial to True Blood star Anna Paquin’s Alexander McQueen formal get-up from last year or not. What say you?

TWO WORDS:
Fumble or touchdown?

Love, SF~~~~~*
Rest in peace, my Mollo and Zuzie.

Bye Bye Birdie?

WELCOME TO the happily-hosted-by-Grandma’s-Goulash Succinctly Yours, a perfectly wonderful meme that picks up where our dearly departed Microfiction Monday left off by asking the burning question:

How low can you go?

THE GIST: Use the photo provided by GG as inspiration for a story of 140 characters or 140 words. (It doesn’t have to be exactly 140, just not more.) Oh?! *nods an impressed head* You want an even BIGGER challenge?! Then incorporate the word of the week into your flash tale! This Monday's assignment is "beneficial," which I chose to skip since that smitch of the game is optional. <–Whew! and thank God, because I don't need that kind o' presha!)

HERE’S
September 19th’s picture
AND my story:

As "real" boy wannabee Donald patiently meanwhiled, it was back to the drawing board for designated wish-requesters, Les and Tina, snubbed by the Blue Fairy who insisted she was backlogged. --29 words

TWO WORDS:
Mission Impossible?

I THINK NOT, because looky looky what happened the day the Blue Fairy got held up in traffic, so she called Walt to say she'd be late for work, and then Glee's casting director Robert Ulrich, who by chance was getawaying at Disney World, came to the rescue:

BEFORE

AFTER!

THREE more WORDS:
"Don't stop believin'!"
--Steve Perry, Journey lead singer

There are no strings on me-ly!
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

Rest in peace, my Mollo and Zuzie.

Am I Up for Some Halloweenie Mood Music? Well, That Dep-- Better Just Read for Yourself...

WHEN IT COMES TO pee-my-pants-just-thinking-about-it scary music, in my book the theme from The Exorcist is second only to the more-than-put-goose-bimples-on-my-goose-bimples' goose bimples theme-songy introduction George A. Romero gave to his anthology horror TV series (Reminder: Turn off my Playlist before clicking the ">". Thanks!),

Tales from the Darkside!


ONE WORD:

Depends.
I'M JUST SAYING.

If you need me, I'll be under the covers-ly,
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

Rest in peace, my Mollo and ZuZu.

Orintholgical Dejecta-ly Yours

WELCOME TO the happily-hosted-by-Grandma’s-Goulash Succinctly Yours, a perfectly wonderful meme that picks up where our dearly departed Microfiction Monday left off, by asking the burning question:


How low can you go?

THE GIST: Use the photo provided by GG as inspiration for a story of 140 characters or 140 words. (It doesn’t have to be exactly 140, just not more.) Oh?! *nods an impressed head* You want an even BIGGER challenge?! Then incorporate the word of the week into your flash tale! This Monday's assignment is "methodical," which I chose to skip since that smitch of the game is optional. <–Whew! and thank God, because I don't need that kind o' presha!)

HERE’S
September 12th’s picture
AND my story:

Pointing a feathered finger at the perfect size targets below, Mother Grackle encouraged her babylings: "It's never too early to begin splatting practice, my dears!" -25 words

TWO more WORDS:

Bombs away!

Birds of a feather poop togetherly,
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

Rest in peace, my Mollo and ZuZu.
Grackle images courtesy of Hilton Pond Center.

Petrified!

(How playful be the effects of Klari Reis’ use of reflective epoxy polymer to depict electron microscopic images of natural and unnatural cellular reactions culturing in Petri dishes, confuting the serious nature of the subject matter!)

“BEFORE A MAD SCIENTIST GOES mad, there's probably a time when he's only partially mad. And this is the time when he's going to throw his best parties.” –Jack Handey

HAPPY
Jack Handey
FRIDAY, all!

(Mad bacteriologist Rob, inventor of the dish he named after himself, would later add an “E” to his last name after making a career change that would make him the head writer of a comedy variety show filmed in Manhattan.)

DID YOU KNOW this about me? That I do not cook, not even mediocrely, a trait of mine that hungry family members, who expect yours truly to wait on them hand and foot, find

maddening,

except if they are willing to get Chicken of the Sea-y, because I forgot: I do do tuna. And I’m willing to share my most favourite tuna fish sandwich recipe with you!

FIVE WORDS:
It’s your lucky day, huh?!

Chicken of the Sea Tunaburger
(AKA the Disneyland Pirate Ship’s authentic recipe, which serves four)

Mix one can of Chicken of the Sea Tuna with 1 T of chopped onion, 1/4th cup of chopped celery, a teaspoon of lemon juice, and two Ts of mayonnaise. Slice 4 sesame-seeded hamburger buns into 3 horizontal sections. Spread the tuny mixture onto the middle bun slice. On the bottom bun spread Pink Sauce (2 T of mayo mixed with 2 T of catsup until it becomes the 1950s idea of Thousand Island dressing) and cover with a “dill pickle slices” layer (Walt Disney’s druthers was just the opposite, but I no like sweet pickles.) Dagwood the sections together to make a "triple decker" sandwich, then wrap it up in “alumilum” foil, which is always hard for me to say, so I’m glad I only have to write it, and bake in a 375* oven for 15 minutes. Eat it hot! (It definitely promises yum!)

Rob, Ap-Petrie! Bon Appetit!
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

Rest in peace, my Mollo and Zuzie.

Bat Scratch Fever

"Don't hate me because I'm beautiful my rose-coloured glasses
are atypical." --Sparkle LeBrock

SHALL WE BEGIN with a little something that ofttimes has been deemed the perfect modifier for yours truly? Let's shall!

FOUR WORDS:
bats in the belfry

HAS A NICE ring to it, dudn't it, because, yes, I take it as a compliment! Yep, I'd much rather be teetering on the crazy edge of Technicolor than be regarded as, oh, I don't know...BEIGE?!

WAIT, there's more!

GOT A NOSTALGIA itch you can't quite scratch?

(The cherry-red nails are a nice touch,
wouldn't you agree?! And the answer is "yes," I am retractable!)
Allow me to to do the honours!
PRESENTING:


"Bats in the Belfry,"
a classic MGM theatrical cartoon from 1942 starring comical and loony singing bats times three in a belfry, music-mannerly explaining to us why they are associated with nuttiness (Especially the smallest!), which didn't air often enough during my mid-1950s TV viewing, if you ask me. So, everytime it did, naturally, I was inches-away plastered to the screen, my prime location back then anyway. It'll only take 6 minutes and 56 seconds to watch, okay? Okay! You won't be sorry, I promise you. Quick like a bunny Like a you-know-what outta hell, make with the cLiCkY-cLiCkY on the Youtube > and enjoy! (To avoid going completely batty, don't forget to turn off my Playlist before you get started. Thanks!)

THEN, WALK this way:

WELCOME TO the happily-hosted-by-Grandma’s-Goulash Succinctly Yours, a perfectly wonderful meme that picks up where our dearly departed Microfiction Monday left off, by asking the burning question:

How low can you go?

THE GIST: Use the photo provided by GG as inspiration for a story of 140 characters or 140 words. (It doesn’t have to be exactly 140, just not more.) Oh?! *nods an impressed head* You want an even BIGGER challenge?! Then incorporate the word of the week into your flash tale! This Monday's assignment is "practice," which I chose to skip, since that smitch of the game is optional. <–Whew! and thank God, because I don't need that kind o' presha!)

HERE’S
September 5th’s picture
AND my story:

"If I only had bats in my belfry!" snorted Essie, contender wannabe in Salem Boo! Fest's 13th Annual Outstanding-in-Their-Field Haunted Schoolhouse Contest. --22 words

That's all she wrote, because bat's the way, uh-huh, uh-huh, I like it, uh-huh, uh-huhly,
SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

Rest in peace, my Mollo and Zuzie.